Becoming Buffy Again
by Atterb
Summary: During and after ‘Bargaining, Part 2.’ Spike is the first one to find the frightened Buffy. He cares for her, and helps her back to reality, as the other Scoobies struggle with the darkness they released upon themselves. Spuffy! COMPLETE.
1. The Other Buffy

Chapter 1: The Other Buffy  
  
A/N: During Bargaining, Part 2.' Spike is the first one to find Buffy - and she is less mentally stable. Partly inspired by A. Price's wonderful fic Safe.' All quotes from buffyworld.com  
  
Dawn and Spike poked through the rubble on Main Street. They spotted the torso of the Buffybot lying on the ground.  
  
Seeing the hurt expression on the girl's face as she looked at the pieces, Spike said, It's just a machine, Dawn. He realized he needed the reminder, too.  
  
Dawn sighed, and replied, I know.  
  
Dawn kneeled beside the bot. Spike turned and walked away a bit.  
  
Dawn reached out to close the bot's eyes, but suddenly the head turned and looked at her. Dawn gasped.  
  
Buffybot spoke, saying Dawn. You're my sister Dawn.  
  
Dawn didn't know what to say. She gave the bot a tentative smile.  
  
Buffybot: (looks around in confusion) Where did I go?  
Dawn: What?  
Buffybot: Where did I go? I was here. Here. But then I ran away.  
Dawn: (confused) I-I don't...  
Buffybot: No. Not me. The other Buffy.  
  
Dawn's eyes widened in shock.  
  
Buffybot: Yes. The other Buffy.  
Dawn: Buffy?  
Buffybot: I don't ... I don't ... know where she ran off to. Maybe-  
  
She froze mid-word, staring blankly.  
  
Dawn backed away, got up, still shocked. She stared at the lifeless bot before turning and running away.  
  
Meanwhile, Spike was picking up a piece of twisted metal from the scrap pile. It was one of the bot's legs.  
  
Spike: Tsk. Look what those filthy buggers done to you. (loudly, to Dawn) Willow's slap-and-paste job's not gonna do the trick this time. Robot's done.  
  
He looked up, noticing that Dawn was gone.  
  
he shouted, looking around,Little Bit? Dawn! Dawn!! ... Where the bloody hell could she have gotten to? Damn! Probably headed home... I'm gonna rip the stupid chit's head off!... Drink from her brain stem! Spike continued muttering various threats, trying to hide his worry, as he raced back to his newly acquired motorbike to head home.  
  
He was in such a rush to get home and (hopefully) find Dawn that he almost didn't hear it. Just as he was about to turn on the motorcycle, he heard a small sound. Spike debated whether he should investigate or not; he wanted to get back to Dawn as soon as possible. On the other hand - maybe it was Dawn!  
  
he cried out as he rounded the corner into the alley where he'd heard the noise.   
  
He spotted one of the bikers, looking as if he was chasing something into the alley. Spike snuck up behind him and -snap!- broke the hulking creature's neck. He didn't have time for a real fight.  
  
Dawn! You here? he called again.  
  
He paused. Either Dawn was hurt and couldn't respond (_no, not that!' )_ or it was someone else.  
  
He sniffed the air. Blood! And it did _sort_ of smell like Dawn's...  
  
Still, he didn't see anyone... he changed faces briefly, needing the enhanced night vision his game face would bring. Ah... there! That little bundle in the corner! A little girl, maybe?  
  
Remembering to changed back to his human visage, Spike cautiously approached. Not wanting to scare the child, he used the same techniques he'd used when Dru had gotten frightened.  
  
The girl's cries become louder as he came nearer, and she shrunk back even further, her face still obscured by her long hair.  
  
Spike crouched down near her. In the sort of voice people use with scared animals, he said, Shhh... hey there.... I'm not gonna hurt you, ok? Are you all right? Are you lost?  
  
The whimpering grew quieter, and the bundle unfurled just a bit. Cautiously, Spike reached out a hand to touch her. He knew he needed to go slowly here, and it was driving him crazy since part of him was screaming to go find Dawn. But he couldn't just leave this girl here, although he had no desire to analyze _why_ that might be.  
  
She jerked a bit when he touched her, but then calmed as he stroked her dirty, long hair.  
  
There, there... he whispered. You're ok, now.  
  
The girl's head came up to look at him. A bloodied hand moved to brush aside her hair so she could see her savior.  
  
It took him a moment to distinguish her features, but when he did, he nearly fell over backward.  
  
_ he half choked. Is it really -  
  
As his voice got louder, she shrank back again.  
  
__Ok, calm, calm... it's really her! Oh, my sweet Slayer, my love... need to take care of her, need to get her home...  
  
_It's ok, luv, it's ok. I'm going to pick you up and take you home, ok?  
  
Fearing that she might bolt, he carefully put his arms under her and lifted her up.   
  
To his relief, she didn't struggle. After a moment, her arms went up around his neck and her head burrowed into his chest.  
  
Figuring that the motorbike would scare her, Spike opted to walk home. It wasn't that far, and he was enjoying just holding her, smelling her, having her there. Though he smelled blood, she wasn't bleeding profusely anywhere, and he figured he'd patch her up once they got home.  
  
A/N: Well, that's chapter 1! Please, please, PLEASE - review!!! It's really what keeps me writing.   
  
Special thanks to Moluvsnumber17 - I was just debating about whether or not to start posting today when I got a review from you! That decided me :)


	2. Enter the Scoobies

Chapter 2: Enter the Scoobies  
  
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He breathed a sigh of relief as he spotted home.  
  
_Good, didn't get damaged...  
  
_ As he walked onto the porch, he realized he needed to put her down to open the door.  
  
"Ok luv, gonna set you down for a second, ok?" He tried to gently lower her. She clung to him with Slayer strength.  
  
"Well, let's just see if I can't get that door open even with you in my arms..."  
  
It was a bit of a tricky maneuver, but he managed.  
  
Carefully setting his precious bundle on the couch, disentangling her arms from around him, he shut the door.  
  
"Dawn!" he called out, not too loudly, afraid of scaring Buffy. "Dawn, you here?"  
  
"Spike!" Dawn bounded down the stairs.  
  
"Nibblet! What the bleedin' hell happened to you?"  
  
"Sorry, Spike. I wandered off a bit, and then one of those bikers chased me... I guess I outran him, or maybe he just lost interest. I decided I should just come back here, rather than-"  
  
"Dawn." Spike cut off her torrent of words. "Calm down. Something happened."  
  
"Something bad?"  
  
"No, something good, very good... but you _have_ to be calm, ok, Nibblet?"  
  
She nodded at him with large, frightened eyes.  
  
"It's... it's Buffy. She's... she's back."  
  
Spike watched as Dawn slowly processed this. He could see she was becoming excited, but managed to control herself. "What? You mean, really back, as in, alive?"  
  
"Yeah... in the living room, in fact."  
  
Dawn raced over to the threshold. Barely recognizing her sister underneath all the dirt and grime, she slowly approached. "Buffy? Is that really you?"  
  
As she got within a few feet, Buffy withdrew, began whimpering again. She turned frightened eyes to Spike, begging her savior for protection.  
  
He was at her side in a flash, arms around her. "Shhh... it's ok, luv... it's just Dawn, your sister, remember?"  
  
As he continued calming Buffy, he turned to Dawn. "Obviously, she's had some kind of traumatic experience... she's a tad skittish right now... I've dealt with worse before, though, with Dru," he reassured the girl. "Nibblet, why don't you fetch the first aid kit, all right?"  
  
Dawn nodded, not fully understanding what was going on, but wanting to help.  
  
Dawn reappeared from the kitchen carrying medical supplies.  
  
"Got it," she said, handing the box to Spike.  
  
As she entered the living room, the front door burst open and the others rushed in.  
  
Willow: Is she here?  
Anya: She's here!  
Willow: You're here.  
Xander: We didn't know where you were.  
Anya: You ran away.  
Willow: Buffy!  
Tara: Are you okay?  
  
The four spat the questions at Buffy in rapid-fire. She curled into Spike even further, hiding her head against his chest once again.  
  
Shocked, Dawn gasped, "How did you know she was back?"  
  
Willow: A spell. We, we did a spell.  
Anya: We didn't think it worked, but... (to Buffy) You're not a zombie, are you?  
Xander: Anya!  
Willow: Are you in pain?  
Xander: What do you remember?  
Tara: What do you know about what happened?  
  
Buffy started crying, while Spike tried to soothe her quietly, leaving it up to Dawn to defend her big sister.  
  
"Hey! Back off!" Dawn commanded.  
  
The Scoobies looked at Dawn in surprise.  
  
"She's... she's obviously upset. She's had some kind of traumatic experience," the young girl explained, borrowing Spike's words. Taking charge, Dawn said, "I think you all need to leave now. We'll take care of her."  
  
Willow: But we brought her-  
Tara: We want to help-  
Xander: Spike should get out-  
A chorus of voices spoke out.  
  
"QUIET!!" Dawn shouted, glancing back apologetically at her sister and Spike as Buffy's cries got louder. Turning back to the four Scoobies, she continued more quietly. "Go. _Now_. We will talk about it tomorrow."  
  
Again a babble of voices arose.  
  
Disgustedly realizing that they might not shut up any time soon, Spike lifted the trembling girl in his arms.  
  
Unsurprisingly, it was Xander who exclaimed, "Hey! Where do you think you're going with her, Dead Boy?"  
  
"I'm going to put her in her room. You lot are scarin' her to death with all this racket." Spike responded softly, still using his calm voice.  
  
As he expected, noise rose up behind him as he went upstairs. However, he trusted that his Nibblet would take care of them.  
  
Meanwhile, he had Buffy to take care of. He decided to head to the bathroom first.  
  
Away from everyone else, she calmed down enough to let him set her on the toilet seat.  
  
As he wet a washcloth and began gently trying to get at the worst of the mud, he kept up a soft, running monologue, which seemed to soothe her.  
  
"There we go, just gonna get you cleaned up a tad... don't worry about th' Scoobies, they're just all excited 'cause you're back... as am I... oh, luv, you don't know how much I've missed you!" he turned away to hide a sob, trying to get his emotions under control. He needed to remain calm around her.  
  
He turned back to washing her. A few minutes later, Dawn hesitantly stopped at the threshold of the bathroom.  
  
"Hey, Spike," she said softly. "They're all gone... they weren't happy about it, but I got 'em to leave. I think Xander was the only one who was really upset with you being here, the rest just really wanted to help Buffy... oh, and here's the first aid kit," she said as she handed it to him.  
  
"Thanks, good job, Platelet... I think you can come a bit closer, big sis is doin' a bit better now... I'm gonna tackle her hands now, might need your help with that."  
  
As Spike lifted Buffy's bloodied hands up, Dawn gasped. "What happened?"  
  
Grimly, Spike replied, "Looks like she had to dig herself out of her own grave. S'not fun; 've done it myself."  
  
As the two began cleaning and bandaging Buffy's hands, Dawn asked, "But... the others, they brought her back, so... why would they leave her in her grave?! That's... that's so _horrible_!"  
  
"Yeah, Nibblet it is... wakin' up in your own grave is a terrifying thing," he said, shuddering at the memory. "But th' Scoobs can be right bloody wankers, sometimes. Look at 'em, not tellin' us about this lil' project of theirs... 've got some worries 'bout Red and her magic, too. Can be a dangerous thing..." Spike thought out loud.  
  
Shaking himself back to the present, he asked Dawn to help get her sister into her room.   
  
"I think we'll leave off anything more till tomorrow. We got all th' wounds cleaned, we'll get the rest of her tomorrow. Think she mostly needs sleep now... here, let's get her into a nightgown."  
  
Dawn decided not to ask how he knew exactly where all of Buffy's clothing was. She watched, surprised at his gentleness, as he helped Buffy get out of her dress and into something more comfortable.  
  
"You look like you've done this before," Dawn commented.  
  
"Yeah... had to help Dru with her clothes pretty often... ok, well, we're all done here, let's let big sis get some rest."  
  
Although she'd been quiet for quite some time, Buffy began protesting, screeching, as Dawn and Spike left her. She calmed down once they returned to her side.  
  
"Listen, Nibblet, why don't you go get ready for bed, and then you can sleep here with big sis, k? I'll stay here till then."  
  
Dawn nodded eagerly, and scampered off to get ready for bed. Sometimes, during the long summer without Buffy, she'd curled up next to the Buffybot, taking what comfort she could find from the robot. Sleeping next to her actual sister sounded wonderful.  
  
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Buffy had put up a bit of a fuss when Spike left her with Dawn, but settled down quickly enough. She fell asleep quickly, obviously exhausted from whatever she'd gone through.  
  
Dawn, however, did not get to sleep quite so easily. She lay next to her sister, staring at her face in the moonlight. It was hard to believe that this was actually her sister, and not the Buffybot.  
  
As Dawn drifted off, Anya's question, "Are you a zombie?" resounded in her head...  
  
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A/N: A HUGE thanks to those who reviewed!!! See, you review and then you get another chapter - it's called bribery ;o) (Or positive reinforcement, if you don't like the term bribery)


	3. Spreading the News

Chapter 3: Spreading the News  
  
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Unsure of what to do with himself, Spike decided to do a little cleanup patrol. It was slightly more dangerous than usual, since he was rather distracted. Unbidden, the words, She's back, she's back, she's back, kept running through his mind. He still hadn't gotten over the shock of it. 147 days without her, and suddenly she was back.  
  
But where had she been? What had happened to her to make her like this? Would she recover?  
  
And why HAD the Scoobies left her in her grave? Spike's face tightened at the thought. Whatever she'd been through before being brought back, finding herself trapped in her own coffin certainly contributed to her trauma.  
  
_Bloody wankers,' _Spike thought again. He was actually a bit worried that they would kick him out now. He'd thought he'd earned at least SOME measure of respect from them over this past summer, fighting next to them. But it was hard to say, with that lot.   
  
And what would happen to his precious Bit? He sighed. He couldn't imagine the jumble of feelings she must be dealing with right now. And he didn't know how to help her.  
  
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He arrived home before dawn. After having nearly been staked with his own stake, he decided that getting himself killed really wouldn't help Buffy or his Bit. Glancing at the clock, he calculated what time it was in England.  
  
Time to tell the Watcher. And see if Ripper made an appearance.  
  
::Ring, ring::  
  
::Ring, ring::  
  
_Come on, you wanker, pick -'  
  
_  
  
Hey Rupes.  
  
Spike! This is unexpected... Oh dear, what's wrong?  
  
Nothin's wrong. Well, actually some road pirates decided to take over the Hellmouth... But that's not what I called about. Are you sittin' down? Spike asked. _Could I get any more cliché?' _he thought to himself. Too many soaps.  
  
Spike heard sounds of moving around, indicating that Giles was actually going to sit down. He could imagine the Watcher sitting in a overstuffed armchair, polishing his glasses.  
  
I'm sitting. What is it? Giles asked worriedly. Spike was not one to call across the ocean and ask him to sit down unless there was something truly serious going on.  
  
Spike swallowed heavily. What were the right words for this situation?  
  
She's... she's back.  
  
She? ...Drusilla?  
  
Wha- no! The Slayer. Buffy.  
  
Spike heard some scuffling sounds, as if the phone had fallen. A minute later, Giles came back on the phone.  
  
Eh, sorry about that, I'm afraid I dropped my glasses when you said... what you said. Mind repeating that? Perhaps I'm getting senile.  
  
That may be, Rupes, but if you heard me say Buffy's back,' you heard correctly.   
  
Silence.   
  
Watcher? You still there? Haven't ad a heart attack or anythin'?  
  
No, no, I'm still here. Just shocked.  
  
Yeah, know what you mean. Couldn't believe it myself when I first found   
  
You found' her?  
  
he sighed. Here was where the story got interesting. The Scoobies brought her back.  
  
What? When? How?!  
  
Uh, to answer some of those... when' was apparently last night. How,' I dunno yet. I'd imagine Willow was the main one behind it.  
  
Spike could once again imagine Giles furiously cleaning his glasses as he thought about this.  
  
Yes, I'd imagine so as well... That STUPID girl! Giles burst out. The forces she harnessed, the lines she's crossed, the incredible risks-  
  
I know. m not stupid, I get what she did. That's the thing with magic. There's always consequences.  
  
Willow's blatant disregard for the forces of nature disturbs me, to be honest, Spike. She luckily managed to avoid unleashing hell on Earth, but who knows what will... he trailed off. His concern over Willow's abuse of magic was just a cover for what he was really trying to grasp - the sudden return of his pseudo-daughter from the dead. That's what he needed to try and focus on. We can discuss this later. Now, I want to hear about... about Buffy. How... how is she?  
  
There was an ominous pause. Spike? How is she? Giles repeated.  
  
She's human, I can tell ya that much. But as for anything else, well... it's too early to tell yet, Watcher. She's a bit wild at this point. Loud noises scare her, things like that. She doesn't seem too aware of what's goin' on round her... but she just got back. Give er time, Spike said, as gently as possible. He knew the old man loved Buffy just as much as he did, albeit in a very different way.  
  
But who knows where's she has been, or what she may have experienced?!  
  
Well, I know one thing that happened to her, Spike said angrily. She clawed erself out of her own bleedin' coffin!  
  
Giles gasped, shocked. You can't mean that they-  
  
They did, Spike confirmed grimly.   
  
The men remained silent for a few moments, contemplating the violence they'd like to inflict upon those who'd hurt the girl they loved.   
  
Surprisingly, it was Spike who first shook himself out of his violent daydreams. Look, Rupes, one of the reasons I wanted to tell you all this before you came back, is cause we need to do some research on bein' brought back. What might happen now, what we can do to help her, that sort of thing.  
  
Yes, all right, Giles said, a tad surprised Spike had suggested research, but not as much as he would have been a few years before. Giles suspected that Spike was a closet intellectual.  
I'll grab some books from the Watcher library before I leave. I'll look into it on the flight over, and more once I get there. I'm not sure how much information there is on this sort of occurrence, but perhaps there may be some references in-  
  
Sure, Watcher, whatever you say. Just get here as soon as you can, with as much info as you can get your hands on.  
  
Giles sighed. I'll take a taxi from the airport. See you in a day or so.  
  
Bye, Rupes.  
  
::Click::  
  
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A/N: Sorry this was mostly talk! My stories do tend to be that way, just warning you.  
  
A lot of lines I used were from the show. As usual, I got them from buffyworld.com  
  
And thank you once again to those who reviewed! I can't tell you how much they mean to me, so please, keep it up! :oD


	4. Interlude, of Nightmares and Cuddly Vamp

Chapter 4: Interlude, of Nightmares and Cuddly Vampires  
  
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As he hung up the phone, Spike's stomach grumbled at him.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, I hear ya..." he muttered, heading into the kitchen for 'dinner.'   
  
He was sitting at the table with his dinner of warmed blood, Wheatabix, and burba weed when he heard some shrieks from above him.  
  
Spike bolted up the stairs to Buffy's bedroom, scared beyond belief at what he might find. He arrived before the sound of the first shrieks ended.  
  
Dawn was across the room, looking dazed and bruised, but otherwise unhurt. Buffy, however, was tossing and turning and clawing wildly in her sleep. She'd accidentally hit Dawn, Spike guessed, and would soon be hurting herself if she wasn't already.  
  
Seeing Spike, Dawn cried out with relief, "I don't know what's wrong with her! She just started screaming, and-"  
  
"It's ok, Niblet, it's ok. Go to your room and keep out of the way for a bit, yeah?" As he spoke he kept his eyes on Buffy, creeping nearer the bed, trying to figure out the best way to help her.  
  
_Oh well, what the hell, I've always favored the direct approach_.  
  
As gently as he could, he crawled on top of Buffy, holding down her flailing body with his own.  
  
"Buffy! Buffy, luv, wake up! it's not real, it's just a dream, I'm here, it's ok." As he kept repeating comforting phrases, Spike felt the Slayer slowly start to calm under him. When she was more tranquil, he climbed off and crouched beside her. He lovingly stroked her long hair, until her eyelids began to flutter open.  
  
He wasn't surprised that she was startled when she first awoke, though Spike didn't expect the blow that sent him crashing across the room.  
  
Stunned only for a moment, he was soon up and approaching Buffy. She was standing, looking at him worriedly, giving pitiful little mewls to express 'sorry' as best she could without words. She carefully touched his head and torso as if looking for any damage.  
  
"I'm ok, luv, don't worry about it," Spike reassured her. Satisfied, she suddenly hugged him tightly.  
  
_Good thing I don't need to breathe, _he thought, caressing her hair again. Both of them found the gesture calming.  
  
After a time, Spike reluctantly pulled back from her a bit. "Think you can go back to sleep now, pet?" he asked gently, unsure as to how much she could understand. He gestured to the bed, and motioned for her to lie down.  
  
She did so, but refused to let go of him, instead pulling the vampire down with her. Getting him to lay as she wanted, with an arm around her, she cuddled against him and fell asleep, with Spike not far behind.  
  
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A/N: Once again, thank you again so very much for the reviews! They really do get me writing. Sorry this was short, more soon!


	5. In the Morning

Chapter 5: In the Morning   
  
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The morning did not start well, to say the least. Due to the rather unusual circumstances the night before, Spike had forgotten to shut the blinds, and thus woke up on fire.  
  
"Owww!" he yelled, leaping out of the sunlight and trying to put the flames out. Luckily, only his hand and part of his arm had caught fire.  
  
Unluckily, however, was Buffy's reaction to the whole event. Her first instinct was to go to him and help, but she was scared of the few flames. She curled up into a ball and began screeching piteously.  
  
Spike tried to go to her, but the patch of sunlight lay between them.  
  
Then it was Dawn to the rescue. She shut the blinds first, almost instinctively doing so after having lived with the vampire for several months. Spike was holding Buffy with one arm in an instant. She quieted.  
  
"Thanks, Bit."  
  
"No problem. I don't know why the blinds were open in the first place. Want me to get you the first aid kit?"  
  
Grimacing, Spike nodded. It was pretty gruesome, and he'd rather take care of it himself, but it was hard to do one-handed.  
  
To her credit, Dawn only blanched slightly at the sight of his charred arm. She quickly wrapped the wound, not bothering with antiseptic since no infection could grow on a corpse, walking or not.  
  
"Thanks, Niblet. Look, do me a favor? Get big sis here fed and cleaned up a bit, I'm knackered, gonna catch some sleep."  
  
Seeing the worry on her face at the thought of being left alone with her unstable sister, Spike hastened to reassure her. "You can do it, Bit. Just try to avoid loud noises and sudden movements, ok?"  
  
Dawn nodded bravely.  
  
Gently taking Buffy's face in his hands, Spike explained to her, "Go get some grub with your sis, ok?" He gestured to Dawn, and helped Buffy stand, and gently pushed her in the direction of the door. As she hesitated, he smiled and told her, "You'll be safe with Dawn, and I'll be right here, ok?"  
  
Whether it was his words or his tone of voice, Buffy seemed all right with the situation, and let Dawn lead her down to the kitchen while Spike got some sleep.  
  
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Spike was awoken abruptly by the sound of angry voices.  
  
_Bloody hell, not this again!_ he thought to himself as he staggered out of bed.  
  
Dawn looked up in relief as she saw Spike descending the staircase. "Spike! Thank goodness. Could ya help me out here?"  
  
Spike looked over the scene. It looked as though Dawn and the girls were lined up against Xander, who was ranting and railing again, undoubtedly about Spike.  
  
Voices were being raised as emotions heightened, and Buffy was looking upset, and about ready to run away. That, or hit something, which would be a serious problem with her Slayer strength.  
  
Spike went to take the scared girl in his arms, but Xander intercepted him.  
  
"Stay away from her, Spike!" Xander warned him, giving him a hard shove, followed by some punches, most of which Spike dodged.   
  
Anya and Willow went to pull Xander away from Spike, but Buffy beat them to it. With one punch, she sent Xander flying, crashing into a wall which he slid down, dazed.  
  
Ignoring him, Buffy turned to Spike, and once again looked him over to see if he was ok. And again he reassured her, hugging her tightly.   
  
Meanwhile, Anya and Willow were helping Xander to his feet, though both looked rather angry.  
  
Leading a limping, subdued Xander out to their car, Anya said, "Sorry about this. I'll go get him patched up and try and... _explain_ a few things to him." She sounded angry, and almost ashamed.  
  
Once they'd left, those that remained just stood there, unsure of how to proceed. Buffy was still tightly wrapped around Spike, and not looking as if she'd let go anytime soon.  
  
"W-why don't we all go sit down in the family room," Tara suggested quietly.  
  
They all trooped in there, with Dawn running ahead to make sure all the blinds were closed.  
  
After they were seated, Tara spotted the bandages on the arm Spike wasn't holding Buffy with.  
  
"What happened?" she asked.  
  
"What? Oh, that. Nothin' much, forgot to shut the blinds last night is all, woke up this mornin' on fire. We had a... an interestin' night."  
  
It was Willow's turn to ask what had happened.  
  
Before Spike could speak, Tara said, "Wait. Actually, if you don't mind, Spike, c-could you tell us about when and where you found her? And what's happened since? I don't mean to pry..."  
  
"Nah, it's ok, Glenda." Spike proceeded to give the witches the gist of what happened. He couldn't keep the anger out of his voice a few times, such as when he mentioned bandaging Buffy's hands. Willow and Tara exchanged a guilty look, and he was about to start in on them about the whole idea, how wrong it was, etc. Unconsciously, his body tensed, and Buffy became agitated. He decided to wait till he had the Watcher to back him up to get into that. Patience wasn't usually his forté, but Buffy's warm arms around him helped him calm down.  
  
When he was finished reciting the events of last night and this morning, he gave them a warning. "Look, try not to startle her. You saw what she did to Xander. She did the same to Dawn and me, on accident. Don't get too near her in her sleep, either. Slayer doesn't know her own strength, and when she gets back to her old self she'll feel bad if she hurt any of you lot."  
  
For the first time, Dawn spoke up quietly. "So, you think she'll get back to her old self? Like she used to be? Anya... last night, she said something about zombies..."  
  
Willow, Tara, and Spike all cried out indignantly at that, all of them assuring the girl that Buffy was certainly human.  
  
"As for getting back to the way she was," Spike said, "no, she probably won't be exactly the same. Wherever she's been, whatever's happened to 'er, well, it changes a person. But she'll still be your big sis Buffy... though I don't know if she has any memories, or if they'll come back..." he looked to the witches questioningly.  
  
Willow shrugged. "I, well, I don't really know. We know Angel was wild at first when he came back from hell; it just took time and care for him to get back to normal. I bet that's the same case here, Dawnie," the witch said reassuringly.  
  
"D-do you want us to stay and help, Spike?" Tara asked hesitatingly, unsure of how the offer would be received.  
  
"Dunno how well that'll work," he replied. "Here, let's try something. Me and Dawn'll go upstairs and see if Buffy is ok staying with you two."  
  
Gently unwinding Buffy's arms from around him, he carefully stood up. When Buffy moved to stand up with him, he gestured for her to remain sitting, and repeated the command aloud. "Buffy, stay here with Red -uh, Willow and Tara, ok? You'll be safe with them, I promise."  
  
Buffy reluctantly complied. She whined a bit as Dawn and Spike left the room, but then seemed to settle down. Willow and Tara began talking softly to her, reassuring her they wouldn't hurt her. It seemed ok at first, till Willow tried to scooch closer to Buffy and give her a hug. With Slayer-fast reflexes, Buffy knocked Willow away, and scuttled backward, curling into a ball again. Luckily Willow hadn't been badly hurt. She and Tara tried to approach Buffy to calm her down, but as they came closer she started wailing again.  
  
The second the sound of her crying drifted up the stairs, Spike was down and at her side, holding her and soothing her. Once she was quieter, he looked at the witches, almost vamping in his anger. "What did you do to her?"  
  
"We were just talking! I tried to hug her, and she hit me and started crying," Willow explained tearfully.   
  
"Look, I think you'd better go, she's not gonna let anyone touch her except me and Dawn," Spike said, striving for calmness.  
  
"Y-yes, we'll go. Perhaps we can find a spell t-to tell us what's wrong - uh, if anything _is_ wrong- with Buffy. W-we'll come back tonight, and see if we can do anything," Tara said, gently tugging her girlfriend out the door.   
  
"Good luck, Spike," Willow said as she walked out the door, nursing her bruise from Buffy.  
  
"Yeah, thanks," he muttered gruffly, his eyes focusing on the scared girl in his arms. "Ah, luv, what am I gonna do with you?"  
  
Though a part of him certainly enjoyed having Buffy trust and depend on him, a much larger part wanted her to be herself again, bantering and fighting with him as usual. But till then, he'd make damn sure to take good care of her.  
  
Drusilla had been much more of a handful to deal with, he reflected. Always trying to wander off, occasionally in the deadly daytime, talking with the stars and her dolls, ignoring him sometimes...   
  
_I can do this_, he reassured himself. Spike's biggest fear was that he'd fail Buffy again, as he had on the tower. But not this time, he vowed. Not this time.  
  
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A/N: Once again, thank you all so very very much for the reviews! It's good to know people are reading :)


	6. A Day With His Girls

Chapter 6: A Day with His Girls  
  
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Their day was spent fairly pleasantly. After the hectic morning, they'd all had some breakfast; Spike and Dawn were delighted to find that, once shown what to do, Buffy could feed herself.   
  
He sent the girls up, instructing Dawn to help Buffy get washed up while he did the dishes from breakfast. He would have preferred to help Dawn, but he figured that when (_not if, when! )_ Buffy got back to her normal self she'd prefer it if he didn't.  
  
Spike caught a few more hours of sleep while Dawn and Buffy played out in the sun.   
  
Later, he watched them from inside - envious, but enjoying the view of Buffy in the sunlight. She really was a creature of light, he reflected. Almost... effulgent. _Oh, hell, not that bloody awful poetry again!  
  
_The girls came back in, and Spike fixed them a nice lunch. After a summer of living with Dawn, he'd learned how to make a few things. Cooking kept his mind off.... other matters, when his usual outlet of violence wasn't available.  
  
Normally, he would have turned to alcohol or suicide, but with Dawn as his responsibility, these weren't viable options. So he'd turned to more mundane activities during the daytime, unleashing his violence in the night.  
  
The rest of the day was spent indoors, with Dawn and Spike talking or playing cards while Buffy watched on, interested. They tried to involve her as much as possible, but it was difficult to do so with her apparent inability to speak.   
  
Spike would have been more than happy to just spend the whole day staring at Buffy. It still felt unreal to him, that she was actually back.   
  
He wasn't certain about how Dawn was doing, either. Obviously, she was overjoyed to have her sister back. But he suspected she was in shock, much like he was. They'd spent the past summer grieving for Buffy - and now, thanks to Willow, ::poof!:: here she was! To say that it was a shock was putting it mildly.  
  
Once the sun set, Spike walked with Buffy a bit, and let Dawn have some time to herself. Their stroll was mostly silent, but it was a comfortable silence, Spike felt. Buffy stuck close by his side, grabbing onto him when cars and dogs scared her. He reassured her quietly.  
  
After they returned, he saw Buffy and Dawn to bed before he took off on patrol.  
  
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Spike headed back, rather beat from having to take a vamp nest out on his own. When he arrived home, he saw the Wiccas sitting in the living room. _Something wrong?_ was his instinctive reaction. Then he vaguely remembered them saying they'd be back after looking into a spell of some sort. Spike had been much too wrapped up in Buffy to pay attention to them.  
  
He was about to tell them he'd fetch some blood and be right back when he realized there was another in the room.  
  
"Rupes! I wasn't expecting you quite so soon," he greeted the Watcher, a bit surprised he'd gotten to Sunnydale in less than 24 hours.  
  
"I thought the circumstances warranted my haste," the Watcher responded dryly.  
  
"Yeah, well -" the phone rang, interrupting Spike. "Damn!" He leapt for the phone, stopping it after the first ring in an effort to prevent Dawn and Buffy from awakening. He could tell by the stirring he heard from above him that hadn't worked.  
  
"Yeah?" he half snarled into the phone.  
  
There was a brief pause, and some static. Then- "Who is this?"  
  
"You're callin' _me_ and askin' who _I _am? Think you got that a bit backward, mate. Who th' hell are you?"  
  
"**_Spike?!_**" the voice from the other end of the phone shouted disbelievingly.   
  
Spike winced at the loud noise. "Yeah, got me in one."  
  
"What the hell are you doing there? I can't -"  
  
"Ah. Captain Cardboard. Shoulda guessed by the scintillatin' convo we've had so far."  
  
"I'll find out what you're doing there later," Riley warned ominously, with a pitiful excuse of a growl.   
  
He masterfully ignored Spike's response ("ooh, White Bread, I'm _real_ scared now!") and continued on. "I heard that... well, that Buffy was d-dead. Is that true?"  
  
"She was, yeah," Spike responded, deciding that the truth would be the most fun here.  
  
Another pause. "What do you mean, she _was_?"  
  
Annoyed, Spike answered, "Whaddaya mean, what do I mean? I mean, she _was _dead. She got better."  
  
"She... got... better?" Riley repeated disbelievingly.  
  
"Yeah," Spike replied simply, grinning.  
  
Furiously, Riley spat, "Listen, hearing about her death is hard enough without having to deal with _you_! I want some answers NOW, or I swear I'll be there tomorrow and you'll wish you were never - "  
  
Tired of this pointless talk when more important things were to be done, Giles snatched the phone away. "Riley? Yes, look, it's Giles. What happened was this..."  
  
Bored, Spike turned away, seeing the witches and his girls looking at him with varying expressions.  
  
Spike walked over to Buffy and Dawn. "Sorry about all the ruckus."  
  
"It's ok, we weren't sleeping too well anyway," Dawn told him, indicating with a nod towards Buffy that the Slayer had been restless.  
  
"Right, well, how 'bout some hot cocoa, then?" he suggested. Spike led the Summers girls into the kitchen, telling Willow and Tara that he'd be back in a bit to talk to them. They sat back down, feeling oddly chastised by his harsh tone of voice.  
  
Dawn and Buffy sat at the counter as they watched Spike prepare the hot chocolate, the Summers' panacea. Buffy watched him curiously as Dawn prattled on. "So, that was Riley on the phone?" Spike grunted an assent. "Geez, picked a great time to call, huh. Guess he just found out about Buffy being dead... well , except she's not... anyway, wonder why he just found out now? Maybe the news got out some how. Man, I hope that Angel doesn't come rushing over, brooding even more than usual."  
  
Spike smirked at her as he served them their drink - with marshmallows, of course, and a few ice cubes in Buffy's so she didn't burn her tongue. How he remembered these things was beyond Dawn, especially since he didn't really feel the temperature himself.  
  
When all three were sitting, happily sipping their hot chocolate, Spike explained, "I think th' ruse with th' Buffybot might've been found out. That'd be why we got those bikers in the other day."  
  
"But now we've got the real thing back!"  
  
"Yeah, but they don't know that yet. As far as the demon world knows, Buffy's dead."  
  
Just then the front door was flung open. Spike rolled his eyes (a habit he'd picked up from Dawn). "What now?"  
  
He marched back into the front hall, Buffy and Dawn following behind him. When he saw who it was, he had just enough time to say to Dawn, "You realize this is your fault for mentioning him," before Angel leapt towards him, intent upon his attack.  
  
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A/N: Sorry it's been so long since my last update! No, I actually didn't drop off the face of the earth, I was just away for a week.   
  
Thanks again to all who've reviewed so far. Several people mentioned they hoped the Scooby gang get punished for what they did to Buffy - just wait. That's all I'm gonna say for now :-)  
  
I truly do appreciate all the comments/critiques you guys give me - thank you all so very much.  
  
As always, reviews are what keep me writing, so please R&R!


	7. Angel Admits

Chapter 7: Angel Admits  
  
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Angel leapt towards Spike, intent upon his attack. Predicting the obvious move, Spike stepped out of the way, so that Angel landed with a rather large _thud_. Angel quickly kicked Spike, and the two were soon grappling on the ground.  
  
Stop this at once! Giles yelled. As usual, he was ignored.  
  
At first, Buffy shrank back, away from the fight. Then, in typical Buffy style, using actions over words, the Slayer dashed over to where the two vampires fought. She lifted Angel up off of Spike, and slammed him into the nearest wall. Satisfied that she'd gotten him out of the way, she knelt beside Spike, once again checking if he was hurt.  
  
Slightly dazed, Spike sat up and reassured Buffy of his well-being. Angel lay nearby, stunned by Buffy's treatment of him. He stared at the scene before him, shocked by the expression on Spike's face. If he didn't know better, he'd almost think that.... _nah, that's ridiculous...  
_  
Since Angel was loathe to tangle with Buffy, the physical approach seemed out. He moved to verbal. Anyone want to explain what the hell is going on here? he asked, wiping away some blood.  
  
Yeah, you just burst in here and started beating on Spike for no reason! shouted Dawn, moving over to join Buffy and Spike, glaring balefully at Angel.  
  
Attempting to ignore Dawn's defense of Spike - _Spike_, of all vampires! - Angel explained, I meant, what the hell is _he _doing here? With her? And how is it she's back? Is she ok? Buffy?  
  
Angel approached her slowly. She seemed torn between backing away and hitting him. Seeing her reaction, Angel retreated a bit, not wishing to antagonize her. It hurt terribly, seeing her here, like this, in the arms of his enemy.  
  
Attempting once more to take control of the situation, Giles stepped forward. Dawn, Spike, why don't you take Buffy upstairs. We'll explain the situation and the rather extraordinary circumstances to Angel.  
  
Angel expected Spike to gloat, and taunt him; instead, the vampire clearly had eyes only for Buffy. Dawn cast one nasty look back at him, then the three were gone, up the stairs.  
  
Fine. Explain, then. Angel growled moodily.  
  
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_A/N: The rest of this chappy is fairly Angel-centered, so those of you who aren't interested in Angel might want to skip it._  
  
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So Giles, Tara, and Willow told Angel what had been going on over the past few years. He couldn't believe how much of Buffy's life he'd missed. He knew about her mother's and her own death, but that was about it. The whole deal with Glory was news to him; of course, he'd been in another dimension during a lot of that ordeal.  
  
Angel struggled to believe that Spike - _Spike!_ - had really let himself be so tortured by the hellgod, all to save an innocent girl. That Buffy had trusted him enough to watch her sister and mother, that he'd protected Dawn with his unlife, falling from a tower when he failed. Most of all, he couldn't believe Spike stayed around, even after Buffy was gone.  
  
Spike had once confided in Willow that Buffy had told him to protect Dawn. It was obviously a duty which he took seriously.   
  
It would have been easy to say it was all just an act to get into Buffy's pants - but what about when she was gone? No more excuses, then. No reason for Spike not to go and get the chip out, or get minions to kill for him. But he didn't.   
  
Angel told them he needed some time, that he'd be back later that night. He went out for a walk through the Sunnydale cemeteries, staking a vampire here and there. He noted absently that there wasn't the increase in vampires and demons that one would expect after a Slayer's death. Of course, there'd been the bot - and how sick was _that_? - but there had also been Spike.   
  
Angel was torn. Deep down, he knew that Spike was capable of loving, and that when he loved, he did so with all of his being. But actually admitting this was tantamount to acknowledging that it wasn't because of _what_ he was, that Angelus couldn't love Buffy, but because of _who_ he was. It pained Angel deeply to realize that, even soulless, Spike could love Buffy where Angelus couldn't.  
  
But he knew that Spike had loved Drusilla. Angelus had reveled in this knowledge, using it to torture Spike by flaunting his relations with Drusilla. The Scoobies had explained about how Spike had decided to reveal his feelings for Buffy. They had seemed appalled at the idea of his chaining her up, and paid little attention to the part about Drusilla. The fact that Spike was willing to kill Drusilla for Buffy meant a great deal more than the humans could ever know. Angel understand just how important Drusilla had been to Spike. How had William put it? She was my salvation from mediocrity.' Something like that.   
  
Besides all of that, Spike's emotions were easy to read; his love had shown as he looked at Buffy.  
  
Fine, then. He'd be mature about this and admit Spike really did love Buffy, no matter how bitter it felt. The pain would be one more piece of Angel's penance, one more reminder of Angelus' evil.  
  
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A/N: Sorry about the lack of Angel-bashing, those of you who were looking for that; just not the way I wanted it to go. Hope you liked this chapter anyway! I'm not sure what I think of it, actually; half a chapter of introspection might be a bit too much...  
  
Once again, thank you all **so** much for the reviews! They mean so much to me. **_Please _**continue to review. It really gets me writing!


	8. Consequences

Chapter 8: Consequences  
  
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Angel returned to find Willow and Tara dozing on the couch, Giles studying some text_ (what a surprise)_, and the other three in the living room. Sounds of laughter and quiet chatter came to Angel's ears.  
  
His first instinct was to run in there and tear Spike away from the Summers girls. Taking some useless deep breaths, he calmed down, remembering his decision regarding Spike.  
  
Upon seeing Angel, Giles reluctantly closed his book and lay it reverently on a nearby table. "I take it you've had your time to think?"  
  
The witches woke up, and the others came into the family room.   
  
"What, has the great Peaches made up his mind? Do you approve, Grand-Sire?" Spike sneered. "You know that what you say doesn't matter. I'm stayin', whether you like it or not."  
  
"Oh, grow up, Spike!" Giles muttered. Sighing, he addressed Angel, admitting reluctantly that "as Spike said, what you say will likely not change much. However, I would be interested to know, what are your thoughts regarding the matter?"  
  
An odd sound made Angel hesitate. Not seeing or smelling anything amiss, he continued, stating plainly, "I don't like Spike."  
  
Some murmurs arose, most notably Spike's murmur, "Feelin's mutual, git."  
  
Angel continued. "However! Personal feelings and past aside... it's obvious Spike... loves her. And, though it pains me to admit, when he loves, he truly loves with all his being. If everything you all told me was true, then... I guess, well, what I'm trying to say is that I'm ok with the situation. Not happy about it, but ok with it. Plus, Spike has a lot of experience dealing with someone... someone not all there."  
  
There was a loud noise, and suddenly Xander was revealed, some sort of cloak at his feet. "That's _it_?! That's all you're going to say!! I don't believe this!" he shouted, face red. "You're gonna let that sick, _soulless_ monster use and abuse Buffy?!"  
  
Everyone's face revealed shock, first at Xander's startling appearance, and then at his brutal words. His words surprised some more than others. Dawn, Willow, and Tara looked absolutely flabbergasted. Spike had his hands full calming down Buffy, who was once again freaking out with the heightened voices and tensions in the room.  
  
"Hey! Keep your hands off of her!" Xander yelled, springing towards Spike. With his faster reflexes, Angel intercepted him and immobilized him, twisting Xander's arms behind him. Xander struggled futilely for several long minutes, trying to appeal to his friends to come to their senses and stake Spike. Meanwhile, Angel just stood there, holding him firmly.  
  
When Xander finally gave up and stayed silent, Angel dragged Xander to the door. Angel spoke lowly, for Xander's ears alone- "Just so you know - Spike's got a soul. Her name is Buffy." With that, Angel literally threw Xander out.  
  
"And stay out!" Angel growled.   
  
With a few last muttered curses and some dirty looks, Xander stalked away, looking murderous.  
  
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Inside the Summers' house, all was silent, save for Spike's quiet, soothing murmurs to Buffy. Gradually, they all seated themselves, no one having any idea what to say.   
  
More as something to say than for any other reason, Dawn grabbed up the cloak Xander had let fall. "Um... so, what is this?"  
  
Giles cleaned his glasses. "I believe it's a Xurabash cloak. The wearer is not only invisible; their smell is also masked."  
  
"Wow. Cool," Dawn said, petting the cloak covetously.  
  
"Uh, yes, quite. Unfortunately, it tends to have some side effects, such as terrible head aches. And besides, I suspect that belongs to the Magic Shop. I believe that it was among the items we received in a recent shipment."  
  
"As fascinatin' as all this is, let's not ignore the big fat elephant in the middle of the room," Spike said dryly.  
  
"Yes, indeed. That was... rather startlingly," Giles stated. "The question that should now be posed, is: where do we go from here? What can we do?"  
  
"I can't believe this," Willow said softly. "I mean, it's, you know, _Xander!_ He just... doesn't do stuff like this."  
  
"People change," Giles said softly.  
  
"Not like this, they don't. Not like this," Willow wept. Tara held her, comforting her as best she could.   
  
Spike took Buffy and Dawn up to bed again.  
  
"Spike? Is... is everything gonna be ok? I mean, Xander, he's like... like my big brother, you know? Well, like my other big brother, besides you..." Dawn trailed off, hoping Spike wasn't offended by the comparison. "Is he gonna leave? Everyone leaves..."  
  
"I know, Bit, I know... I don't know what's gonna happen now. But I promise I'll always be here, no matter what," he assured her. "Get some rest, we'll talk more tomorrow." He kissed both his girls on the forehead before going back downstairs.  
  
It looked as though no one had moved when he returned to the family room. Just as Giles started to speak, there was a frantic banging on the door.  
  
"Oh, what now," Spike muttered as he opened the door, quickly dodging backward to avoid the first rays of the dawn.  
  
"Anya?"  
  
She burst into the room, Spike closing the door behind her.  
  
All were shocked to see Anya sobbing. None could recall ever seeing her cry before.   
  
"Anya, dear, what's happened?" Giles asked, bringing her over to sit down. Once she was in the light, everyone could see a dark bruise starting to show on her face.  
  
"It-it's Xander!" she wailed. The men in the room exchanged deadly glances, promising violence.  
  
In between sniffles, Anya told them how Xander had come home a little while ago, ranting and raving madly. When she finally understood what he was carrying on about, she'd spoken up for Spike, said she thought he was trustworthy, able to take care of Buffy.  
  
"He looked so wild, and so angry! I've never seen him so angry... h-he hit me!!"  
  
"You're lying!" Willow shouted, jumping to her feet and stomping over to Anya.  
  
"No, I'm not!" Anya yelled back.  
  
"Shut UP!" Willow shrieked, eyes turning black as she pointed a finger at Anya. Spike jumped between the two women.  
  
"Red! Calm down," he told her.  
  
"Out of my way," the witch hissed, flinging him against a wall with a wave of her hand.  
  
"Willow, no!"   
  
It was Tara's voice that finally stopped Willow from whatever she was going to do. She staggered back, gasping. "Oh, goddess! I-I'm sorry, I...." she retreated to the safety and comfort of Tara's arms.  
  
"Spike, you ok?" Dawn asked worriedly as she and Buffy hurried to his side  
  
"Yeah, 'm fine... what the hell was that, though? Red?"  
  
"That's just it!" Anya exclaimed, drawing attention back to herself.  
  
"Um, I'm sorry, what's 'just it'?" Giles questioned, brow furrowed. Trying to follow Anya's train of thought was oftentimes exceedingly challenging.   
  
"See, I think that are two possible reasons why Xander did what he did this morning," Anya explained. "One could have to do with him still being obsessed with Buffy, maybe. Or it maybe - what I'm sort of hoping - it could have had something to do with a negative backlash from the spell."  
  
"Woah, what's this about Xander being obsessed with Buffy?" Dawn spoke up from her position on the stairs. She and Buffy hadn't even fallen asleep before being brought downstairs, once again, by the loud voices.  
  
"Well, it would explain a lot of things about our engagement," Anya said.  
  
"Engagement?" numerous voices repeated quizzically.  
  
"Yes. He first asked me to marry him when he thought the world was going to end because of Glory, then again after the world didn't end, but when Buffy was dead. See, the first time he didn't think he'd actually have to go through with it, and the second time Buffy wasn't around. And then he wouldn't let me tell everyone 'cause they were all in mourning. Later, once we started talking about bringing Buffy back, he became even more insistent that I not tell anyone; eventually he wouldn't even talk about it with me. So maybe he's just been obsessed with Buffy all along, and I was just... just second choice."  
  
Shocked silence followed Anya's speech.  
  
"But," Anya continued, more brightly, "maybe it was just evil backlash from the spell! See, same for Willow. That might have just been Willow being Willow, or backlash."  
  
"Wait, wait... what's this 'backlash' you keep talking about?" Willow asked.  
  
All of the older people in the room looked at her with amazement.   
  
"You mean... you mean you didn't _know_?" Anya demanded.  
  
"Know what?!"  
  
"About all the possible negative consequences of dark magic! You _have _to know about all of those!" Seeing Willow shake her head in confusion, Anya was exasperated. "What kind of witch are you, anyway?"  
  
"An untrained one," Giles inserted. "Which, I fear, is my fault." He cleaned his glasses, sighing. "I knew you wouldn't like the idea of leaving here, leaving all of your friends, for an indefinite amount of time. However, now that's really what you must do."  
  
"What?! That's not fair-"  
  
"Not _fair_?" Giles voice was cold. "Don't talk about fair, little girl, most especially not after that stunt that you just pulled."  
  
"Stunt? That was no stunt, that -"  
  
"Silence!" Giles thundered. "There aren't words to explain just how wrong that spell was, just how wrong things could have gone... you're very stupid. The lines you've crossed, the unbelievable risks, the dangers involved-"  
  
Willow: I thought you'd be impressed, or, or something.  
  
Giles: "Oh, don't worry, you've ... made a very deep impression. Of everyone here ... you were the one I trusted most to respect the forces of nature."  
  
Willow: Are you saying you don't trust me?  
  
Angel: (angrily, protectively) Think what you've done to Buffy.  
  
Willow: I brought her back!  
  
Giles: At incredible risk!  
  
Willow: Risk? Of what? Making her deader?  
  
Giles: Of killing us all. Unleashing hell on Earth, I mean, shall I go on?  
  
Willow: No! (stands) Giles, I did what I had to do. I did what nobody else could do.  
  
Spike: Oh, there are others in this world who can do what you did. You just don't want to meet them.   
  
Willow: No, probably not, but ... well, they're the bad guys. I'm not a bad guy. (upset) Why are you all attacking me? Spike, Angel, Giles- I know you all love Buffy, so why are you so mad?! I brought Buffy back into this world, a-and maybe the word you should all be looking for is "congratulations."  
  
Giles: Having Buffy back in the world makes me feel... indescribably wonderful, but I wouldn't congratulate you if you jumped off a cliff and happened to survive.  
  
Willow: That's not what I did, Giles.  
  
Giles: (angry) You were lucky.  
  
Willow: I wasn't lucky. I was amazing. And how would you know? You weren't even there.  
  
Giles: If I had been, I'd have bloody well stopped you. The magicks you channeled are more ferocious and primal than anything you can hope to understand, (even more angry) and you are lucky to be alive, you rank, arrogant amateur!  
  
Willow: You're right. The magicks I used are very powerful. I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off.  
  
Everyone in the room stared at Willow, shocked. Tara gasped.  
  
Willow: Come on, Giles, I-I don't want to fight. I ... Let's not, okay? I'll think about what you said, and let's all... try to be happy Buffy's back.  
  
Giles: (quietly) We still don't know where she was ... or what happened to her. And I'm far from convinced she's come out of all this undamaged.  
  
Dawn gasped, and ran upstairs, crying.  
  
"Damn it! Nice goin', Watcher. Look, give Buffy some time; I think she'll be ok. Now, if you'll 'scuse us, we're gonna go to Dawn." Spike took Buffy's hand and led her upstairs.  
  
Giles turned to Anya, now. "If you knew about all of the dangers, why didn't you put a stop to it?"  
  
"I talked to Xander about it. He said he was willing to take whatever risks necessary to get Buffy back. And he said that Willow must know about the dangers 'cause she always does all her research, and she must have decided the risks weren't too high, and he trusted her."  
  
"I see," Giles said. Turning to look at Willow, he pressed on with her. "Look, you _must_ go for training, with a coven I know of in England. Willow, you really don't have much of a choice, here."  
  
"Are you saying you're planning on making me go?" Willow asked stubbornly.  
  
"No," Giles replied testily, "I'm saying that if the Council finds out what you've done, they'll likely have you killed."  
  
His words drew gasps from most of his listeners.   
  
White-faced and trembling now, Willow said softly, "K-killed?"  
  
Giles nodded solemnly. "Yes, Willow, killed. That is how serious the Council would take something of this sort. However, I believe that if you are already studying with the coven when the Council finds out, they won't harm you."  
  
"Could I go, as well?" Tara asked shyly.  
  
"Oh! Oh, goodness, I hadn't thought of that, but... the coven doesn't turn down any who truly want to learn, so yes, I suppose so."  
  
"Ok, we'll go," Willow agreed, squeezing her lover's hand. "When?"  
  
"Immediately. Take with you as much as you can; anything else, I can send along."  
  
"You really think we'll need that much?" Willow questioned.  
  
"Did you miss the part about this being for an 'indefinite amount of time'? Because I truly can't tell you how long you'll be gone. And once you begin your training, you can't leave until the Coven says you can."  
  
Willow and Tara exchanged glances. "I guess we don't have much of a choice," Willow murmured.  
  
"No, we don't... But I think it'll be a good experience for us. I haven't had any training since... since my mother died; it'd be nice to have someone to teach us."  
  
"Very good, then. Go pack; I'll make the necessary transportation arrangements."  
  
"Um... wow. Sudden. But, yeah, ok, we get it... thanks, Giles. Sorry about... what I said earlier," Willow apologized.   
  
The witches made their rounds, hugging everyone (except the possibly dangerous Buffy). Dawn cried, and Spike protested weakly that he wasn't the 'hugging' type - then grabbed them both up in a big bear hug, and whispered, "Red, Glinda, stay safe... I... I'll miss you." He turned and walked away rapidly before they could embarrass him by saying how sweet he was. But what he'd said was the truth, and he wanted them to know how he felt.  
  
The witches left; Spike, Dawn, and Buffy remained upstairs, while down in the living room, only Giles, Anya, and Angel were left.   
  
Of those who'd brought Buffy back, two were exiled for a time, one was nearly insane with rage, and the last was heartbroken. Yes, Giles reflected, perhaps Anya was right; perhaps they were being punished for what they'd done. So be it.  
  
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A/N: So, what did ya think? Did ya like it? Hope the Scoobs got knocked down enough for you.   
  
Thank you again so much for the reviews; I know I say this every chapter, but it's still true - reviews just mean so damn much to me! I'm so glad you guys are enjoying my story, that makes me so happy! :)  
  
Please review!   
  
(Oh, some of the lines were from Flooded; a few I altered a bit)


	9. Sexy British Guys Talk

Chapter 9: Sexy British Guys Talk  
  
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A/N: Ok, so after reading through my most recent reviews, I realized that I haven't made certain things clear. So that's what this lil' interlude is about - cleaning up my mistakes.  
  
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Spike wearily plodded down the stairs. For what felt like the millionth time, he'd taken Dawn and Buffy to bed; hopefully, this time they'd actually sleep. He needed to get some rest himself, but wanted to talk to Giles before he did so.  
  
Upon entering the living room, Spike was relieved to find only the Watcher. "Where'd the other two go?"  
  
"Angel's sleeping downstairs and Anya decided to go to the Magic Box," Giles replied. "You know how she gets about missing work."  
  
"Yeah, I do. Nearly took my head off last summer when I suggested she miss a day or two for a sprained ankle."  
  
"Sounds like Anya," Giles said fondly. "So, what have you got to drink?"  
  
"Not much. Some imported beer - the good stuff, not the piss Americans call beer."  
  
Giles chuckled. "Sounds good."  
  
Once the men had gotten their beers and settled down in the kitchen, Spike began. "So, old man, what now? Plannin' on movin' back in?" he asked.  
  
After Buffy's death, Spike had refused to leave Dawn's side. So he had moved in with her. Had the rest of the gang not been in deep mourning for Buffy, they likely would have protested; as it was, no one had to energy or the will to do so.  
  
Giles had suggested that Willow and Tara also move in; to his surprise, they had refused. He now realized that they probably didn't want to worry about hiding their planning for Buffy's resurrection.   
  
So Giles had moved in. Spike originally slept in the basement, but Dawn had terrible nightmares, from which only he could rescue her. He took to sleeping on her floor, by the side of her bed. Buffy's door remained shut; the only thing her room was used for was a space to store and recharge the Buffybot.  
  
With the Buffybot, they hadn't needed to worry too much about Social Services, as long as Giles and Spike weren't around too often when the caseworker dropped by. She was programmed to be perfect - she was never impatient, cleaned the house, etc. And Spike came up with the idea for her to get a job. Giles had protested initially, but Spike had pointed out that not only would that solve some of their financial issues, but it would look good to Social Services. Giles gave in. She turned out to be the ideal worker. Her co-workers were amazed at her ability to remain cheerful after dealing with annoying customers for 8 hours.  
  
There had been a lot of stress in the Summers' house following Buffy's demise. Spike was upset with himself for failing Buffy, and with Giles for demanding that his Sweet Bit should die. Giles didn't like Spike, and - at least subconsciously- blamed Dawn for Buffy's death.  
  
Back in what he thought of as 'the good old days,' Spike would never have tried something as civilized as sitting down and talking through a problem with someone - he'd probably have just torn their head off. But, realizing all the tension wasn't good for Dawn, he went with the talking method. So, in one of the most shocking displays of maturity Giles had ever seen from him, Spike sat Giles down and told him they were going to settle matters between them.  
  
They'd ended up getting slightly sloshed, and bawling together over Buffy's death. Luckily, Dawn was over at a friend's house, so she didn't witness the embarrassing and unmanly display of emotions.  
  
They'd never spoken of that night again, but from then on, their mutual animosity lessened to the point that, if one weren't a Watcher and the other a vampire, they could be called friends.   
  
Giles had eventually decided to head back to England. Most of what was left for him in Sunnydale was bad memories. Willow and Tara had finally agreed to move in, saying that they had another month on their lease, and then they'd live in the Summers' home. With them going to England, however, that plan was no longer viable.  
  
Giles sighed, thinking over Spike's question. Should he move back? He'd created a nice life for himself over in England; on the other hand, he couldn't deny the pull his surrogate daughter had on him.  
  
"I don't know, Spike. I'll need to think about it. At any rate, we should discuss Buffy's situation. How is she, truly?"  
  
"Look, Rupes, she just came back from the dead a few days ago. How do you think she is?... I guess she's still in shock, or somethin'. From whatever her experiences were after her death, and then th' whole havin' to dig herself out of her grave..." Spike shuddered at his memories of doing the same. He shook off the unbidden thoughts and continued. "She's been sort of stuck in 'fight or flight' mode since she got back, though lately - as you saw with the Poof - it's more fight than flight, which I'd say is a good sign."  
  
"Has she spoken?"  
  
Spike sighed regretfully. "Nah, not yet. But she seems to understand Dawn an' me... Did ya find out anythin' from those books of yours?"  
  
"Not much, unfortunately. It is extremely rare for a resurrection to actually bring back a person back as human. In those few cases, the person usually went mad."  
  
Spike snorted. "Thanks, Rupes, that's real reassurin'."  
  
"However," Giles continued, ignoring the interruption, "in the only instance I could find in which the person brought back did not go mad, he was raised using the same spell that Willow used."  
  
Spike grinned. "Well, that gives me some hope. If anyone can do it, Buffy can. Now, I'm gonna go try and actually get some sleep."  
  
Spike threw his beer can in the recycling bin - Dawn had been on his back about recycling lately - and started leaving the room.  
  
Giles called out to him. "One more thing, Spike- are you familiar with this 'backlash' Anya was talking about? If it's true, it could affect Buffy as well as those who cast the spell."  
  
Spike turned back to face Giles and shrugged. "Dunno. Most of the time, people who cast evil spells are either evil or on their way there, so maybe their extra-evilness due to the backlash just doesn't usually get noticed," he hypothesized.   
  
Giles nodded thoughtfully. He'd discovered over the summer that Spike was actually quite intelligent. "That's possible... well, go get some rest. We'll talk more later."  
  
"You need to get some sleep, too, old man," Spike said as he ascended the stairs.  
  
Giles chuckled softly. Somehow, he found it humorous to have a 120 year old call him 'old.' Or perhaps he was just tired. He'd planned to do a bit more reading, but Spike was right; he needed sleep. Hopefully, everything would be clearer after they'd all rested.  
  
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A/N: It's not the Spuffy that we all know and want - but that's coming, I swear!   
  
I know this may not have been a very good chapter - it's more there to explain a few things, such as Buffy's current inability to talk (several ppl asked about that in reviews).  
  
As for the whole 'where was Buffy really,' to be totally honest - I haven't decided yet! I've got 4 choices: Heaven, Hell, Purgatory (by that I mean some sort of in-between, waiting place), or no memory.  
  
Thank you all so very very much for all the lovely reviews! I love reading what you guys are thinking about as you read this. And the constructive criticism is very helpful.  
  
Please review!


	10. Words

Chapter 10: Words  
  
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Spike woke around sunset. He came downstairs to find Dawn and Buffy in the kitchen.  
  
"Hey, Spike! Guess what?" Dawn squealed. "Buffy's started talking!"  
  
"That's great, luv," Spike said, smiling warmly at Buffy, keeping his tone of voice calm. Dawn's hyperness could be enough to bother most anyone, especially someone recently traumatized.  
  
Buffy blushed and looked away. "Thanks," she murmured quietly.   
  
"Ok, so she really hasn't said more than a few words, a-and she doesn't seem to remember much... but hey, it's a good sign, right?"  
  
"Sure, Nibblet. It's definitely a good sign. Let's not overwhelm your sis, though, k?"  
  
"Oh! Ok, right. Yeah, no overwhelming... whaddaya wanna do now, Spike?"  
  
"Breakfast."  
  
"Ewww, blood, gross," Dawn responded, with a face scrunch, as she did every time Spike went to eat. "Come on, Buffy, let's go watch TV."  
  
"Wait a sec, Bit, where's everyone?" he called after her.  
  
"Uh, Angel just left and Giles left a note," she hollered back as she led her sister into the family room.  
  
_I'll be at the Magic Box, researching, should anyone should have need of me.  
Giles  
  
_Spike headed for the phone, figuring he should tell Giles about Buffy's speech recovery. He hesitated, however, and decided to wait on it. He didn't want Giles pressing Buffy with too many questions, however good intentioned they may be.  
  
On the other hand, he wasn't sure he could resist asking her questions right now, either. But he somehow sensed he should leave her be for a bit. Give her some time.  
  
Standing in the entranceway to the family room, Spike watched his girls. Dawn was talking and gesturing animatedly, and Buffy was looking a bit lost, but not unhappy.   
  
_My girls_, he thought happily, realizing he was grinning like an idiot, but not caring in the least. All those months of mourning Buffy together had made Dawn and him even closer, and now, with Buffy back, he finally felt like he was where he belonged- with his family. _Wish Joyce were here_... he thought idly.  
  
Just then, Dawn looked up to see him. "Hey, Spike, come on, it's your favorite show!" she teased. "The Powerpuff Girls!"  
  
"Bloody hell," he groaned halfheartedly, proceeding to sit between his girls, an arm around each. "Not this bleedin' show again!"  
  
"Whatsa matter, Spike, got a problem with strong females?" Dawn joked.  
  
"Ha, bloody ha, luv," Spike groused back.   
  
Buffy just looked at them, her lack of comprehension clear. Then again, Spike speculated, the way Dawn and he communicated was enough to confuse anyone.  
  
Spike resigned himself to watching 'this bloody show' as he referred to it. He didn't really mind it, though, as Dawn well knew. He'd never admit it, but the little girls were kinda cute.  
  
When the show was over, he stood. "Gonna go patrol for a bit. Nibblet, you ok with things here?"  
  
She nodded. "No problem."  
  
"Now, don't stay up too late," Spike admonished. "School starts soon and you need to get back in the habit of sleepin' at night, and bein' awake durin' the day."  
  
Dawn rolled her eyes. "Says the vampire!" When he gave her a serious look, she relented with a sigh and another eye roll. "Yes, Mom, we'll go to bed and eat our broccoli! Now, shoo! Go patrol."  
  
"Yes ma'am!" Spike mocked her gently.  
  
With a kiss on both their foreheads- which was quickly becoming a habit - he left.  
  
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After a fairly normal patrol, Spike headed to the Magic Box to see if Giles was still there. Sure enough, there was the Watcher, working away.  
  
"Didn't I tell ya to get some sleep?"   
  
"What? Oh! Hello to you, too, Spike," Giles responded. Wearily, he leaned back in his chair, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes.  
  
"Find anythin' useful?" Spike asked as he seated himself at the table.  
  
Giles sighed. "Unfortunately, not a whole lot. Anything interesting occur at home, or on patrol?"  
  
"Patrol was pretty normal. Killed a G'las'chn'htudhca demon, those are rare in this climate. At home... well, Buffy can speak a bit."  
  
Just as Spike had predicted, Giles was excited by the news. "That's most excellent, indeed! Why didn't you call to tell me? How much does she remember? Can she-"  
  
Spike cut the Watcher off. "She doesn't seem to remember much. And she hasn't spoken more than a few words, so calm down. I don't want you pesterin' her with your questions."  
  
" 'Pestering' her! I wouldn't 'pester' her, Spike, don't be ridiculous," Giles spoke indignantly, his fatigue heightening his reaction.  
  
"I know, Rupes, I know. I just... though she needed a bit more time, that's all. You can talk to her tomorrow. Come on, let's head home."  
  
Giles looked as though he wanted to argue, but decided against it. The two rose and left the Magic Shop, Giles carefully locking it behind it.  
  
As they walked home, Giles said, "A new development has arisen, one which I wish to discuss with you."  
  
"That doesn't sound too good. What's goin' on?"   
  
"Well, as you know," Giles began in 'lecture tone,' "with the discovery and subsequent destruction of the Buffybot, the demon world considers Buffy to be dead. News of that sort travels quickly around the world. Now, I called the Coven. Willow and Tara are safely with them, and they've assured me that it would be permissible -"  
  
"Watcher, you gonna be gettin' to the point anytime soon?"  
  
Giles glared at him. He was just as bad as Buffy when it came to his impatience! "I was getting there, Spike. My point is that, with the Coven assuring me that it would be all right for the Council to know about the resurrection spell, I decided to call up Quentin Travers and tell him the whole story."  
  
"Wait a sec, you sayin' the Council didn't know Buffy was dead?"  
  
"No, they had no idea up until the time word reached them via their contacts in the demon world. Unfortunately, they heard about this before I called them. By then, events were in motion, and couldn't be stopped. What do you know about Faith, Spike?"  
  
Spike was bewildered. "Uh... it has to do with religion?" he guessed.  
  
"No! Faith, the other Slayer! The one that was called after Kendra was killed."  
  
"Oh! That kinda Faith. Hmm... probably heard about her, but nothin' springs to mind." _Didn't pay much attention to her, since I never tried to kill 'er or shag her_,Spike thought silently.  
  
"Faith was... difficult. She rebelled, allied with the Mayor. She killed humans, tried to kill Buffy, poisoned Angel, stole Buffy's body... well, the list goes on. At any rate, with Angel's help, she apparently saw the error of her ways and turned herself the police. She has been in jail for the best few years. Upon hearing of Buffy's demise, the Council managed to pull some strings and get her released. She's on her way to Sunnydale as we speak."  
  
"Huh. That was a rather long way to go about tellin' me that, mate. Could've just told me that last bit." Seeing that Giles was about to protest, Spike spoke over him. "So what do we do with her?"  
  
Giles sighed, rubbed his brow. "I don't know, Spike. I'm not even certain how to contact her. Tomorrow I will call Angel, see if he knows where she is, precisely."  
  
"So you think she's really on our side, for good this time?"  
  
Another heavy sigh. "I'd certainly like to believe so. Angel assured me that she was, and the fact that she turned herself over to the police would certainly indicate that. However, I've made the mistake of trusting her before... I simply don't know. We'll have to watch her, judge for ourselves."  
  
Spike nodded. "Sounds like a plan. We do nothin' till somethin' happens, and then we do whatever needs to be done. My kinda plan."  
  
Giles snorted inelegantly. "Thank you for your summary, Spike. Just keep your eye on Faith when she's around, all right?"  
  
"Whatever you say, Pops."  
  
Spike chuckled at Giles' groan as they walked into the house.  
  
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Giles headed upstairs to sleep, while Spike wandered into the kitchen for some blood.  
  
With his vampiric vision, there was no need for lights. He heated up his blood and crumbled up Wheatabix in it, then headed for the back porch.  
  
To his surprise, his usual spot was already occupied.  
  
Sitting down slowly, so as not to startle her, Spike said softly, "Hey, pet, what are ya doin' out here?"  
  
Buffy just shrugged a little, without turning to see him. She was staring out into the darkness, expression thoughtful. Her arms were wrapped around herself defensively.  
  
Since he was uncertain of what to say, Spike sat there silently for a while, sipping on his blood while he meditated what he should say to her; if, indeed, he should say anything at all.  
  
It had almost been easier for him when she was acting wild. That, he knew how to deal with. But this? This was new. It vaguely reminded him of the time when he had come to kill Buffy, and found her crying over her mother's illness. He hadn't known what to do then, either. Funny how it was always the back porch.  
  
Finally, he broke the silence. "Can't sleep?" he guessed.  
  
Buffy shook her head.  
  
"Not sleepy?"  
  
She shrugged again.  
  
"More nightmares?"  
  
She nodded hesitantly.  
  
"Oh, luv... look, those monsters aren't real. Try to remember that, ok?"  
  
Spike wished he could give her some better advice. He'd been plagued by nightmares after her death, and still was occasionally.  
  
Buffy shook her head in response to his statement.  
  
Noticing that she was shaking - and figuring that it wasn't from the cold, given the fact that it was summer in California- he slowly scooted closer to her, and put his arm around her shoulders. She nuzzled up against him, her head resting on his shoulder. Spike stroked her hair soothingly, loving the feel of her long, silken hair.  
  
After a few minutes, Buffy rasped, "Real."  
  
"What's that, luv?" Spike asked, startled.  
  
"Monsters... Real."  
  
Spike considered this for a minute. "Well, yeah, monsters are real... but not the ones in your dreams. And real monsters, Slayer - we can fight them, you and I. And kick their asses. So no worrying about monsters, all right, pet?"  
  
Buffy nodded hesitantly. She pulled back a bit, and turned her head to look him in the eyes. She started to say something, and then - Spike couldn't tell. Either she didn't have the words for it, or she decided against saying whatever it was.  
  
With a gentle sigh, she lay her head back on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him.  
  
After several minutes of sitting like that, Buffy murmured sleepily, "Bed?"  
  
"Sure thing, luv."  
  
Spike waited for a moment for her to pull back her arms and get up. When she showed no inclination to do so, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her. She was fast asleep by the time he put her in her bed, next to a snoring Dawn.  
  
Checking to make sure the blinds were fully closed, Spike lay down on the floor beside the sleeping sisters, and was soon dead to the world.  
  
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A/N: Hey, lookee everyone, I finally got some Spuffy in there! I'm actually not too happy with my chappy, or the story in general - hopefully having Faith there will spice things up a bit.  
  
I think I've figured out what I want to do as far as where Buffy was - thanks for your comments, readers.  
  
As always, please keep up the reviews. They keep me writing!


	11. Memories: who needs 'em?

Chapter 11: Memories - who needs 'em?  
  
Summary: The Story so Far....  
  
Buffy was brought back from the dead, a là Bargaining. Spike is the first one to find her. He saves the wild Buffy from a biker, and she clings to him from then on.   
  
The four Scoobies who brought Buffy back are suffering from the negative backlash of the resurrection spell. Tara and Willow are off to England to study with the Coven, Xander is who knows where, and Anya's around. Dawn, Buffy, Spike, and Giles are living in the Summers' home. Buffy has just begun to talk, but still has no memories.   
  
Hearing rumors of Buffy's death, the Council sprung Faith, who's on her way to Sunnydale.  
  
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The next night, Giles informed Spike that Angel didn't know where Faith was exactly, only that she was somewhere in Sunnydale.  
  
"Figures. Leave it up to Peaches to be useless," Spike muttered.  
  
As he so often did, Giles ignored Spike's interruption, and continued on. "Therefore, I think it would be wise for me to patrol with you, tonight."  
  
"What?! No bleedin' way, old man."  
  
"Faith will probably show up, and it's extremely doubtful she'll believe you when you say you're on our side."  
  
"I can take 'er," Spike asserted.  
  
Giles sighed. "Not with your chip, you can't."  
  
Spike looked unhappy at the reminder. "Bugger, I'd almost forgotten 'bout that damn chip. Fine, Rupes, have it your way. Come on, then, let's get goin'."  
  
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As Giles had predicted, they did run across Faith that night. She and Spike sensed one another, and drew closer. Faith was up for a bit of bantering before the fight, allowing Giles a bit of time to catch up to the much faster vampire.  
  
"Heya, Blondie, up for a lil' roll in the hay before I stake ya?"  
  
Spike chuckled. Always was nice to feel appreciated by the ladies. "Don't suppose you'd believe me if I said I was a good little vamp, now would ya?"  
  
Faith smirked. "Nah, you've definitely got the whole 'bad boy' thing goin' for ya. Nice coat."  
  
"Thanks." Spike argued with himself for a moment. Really, he should keep up the small talk, stalling till Giles could get there. But he couldn't resist bragging. "Pulled it off the last Slayer I killed."  
  
He'd expected her to attack him immediately. Instead, she grinned. "Oooh, goodie, maybe this'll be an actual challenge, for a change."  
  
Bloody hell, this girl had balls! And loved the fight as much as he did, apparently. Just as he was about to reply, Giles came stumbling up.  
  
Breathlessly, the Watcher waved Faith back as she was about to attack. She rolled her eyes. "Hi, Giles, nice to see you - we'll talk after I kill this vamp, k?"  
  
"No!" Giles gasped. "He's... he's good!"  
  
"Hey! I'm bloody well not! I'm evil, the Big Bad!" Spike protested. At Giles glare, he relented. "Fine, fine, I'm a bleedin' white hat," he muttered.  
  
"Wait, for real? You're one of the good guys?" Faith asked. At Giles nod, she burst out laughing.  
  
And wouldn't stop laughing for quite some time. When she finally settled down, she asked, "What's the sitch? You gotta soul?"  
  
Spike was horrified at the thought. "Bloody hell!! A soul? Like the Poof? No thanks!"  
  
"The Poof?"  
  
"Angel," Giles explained.   
  
Realizing that Spike had just insulted Angel, Faith got right up in his face. "Don't say anything bad 'bout Angel when I'm around, unless you wanna be dust."  
  
Spike's expression darkened. "So his tortured act's gotten to you, too, huh? Too damn bad, I'll say whatever I damn well please about my grand-sire!"  
  
Giles attempted to head matters off. "I propose Faith and I go to the Magic Box to discuss matters, while Spike finishes patrol."  
  
After one last glare between the two, Spike stomped off into the night, as the Watcher and Slayer walked the other way.  
  
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"So, B's back?" Faith shook her head. "Wild, man, just wild. Only on the Hellmouth."  
  
"Yes, quite," Giles murmured, keeping his not-so-pleasant thoughts about Buffy's resurrection to himself.  
  
"Hey, if she's back... do you really need me around?"  
  
"Well, we're not certain if she'll be able to fight again..."  
  
"Yeah, but you have Spike, right?"  
  
"Yes, we do; however, we've had a bit of a decrease in the number of demons around here, lately - I suspect many found out about the failed attempt by the biker demons to take over the town, and were scared away. But I doubt that will last long."  
  
Faith sighed. "Look, to be honest, I don't wanna be around here. Too many bad memories. I thought I could handle it, but... I'd really like to be elsewhere."  
  
"Anywhere in particular?"  
  
"Anywhere but here sounds good."  
  
Giles took off his glasses. "Well... if you were badly needed here, would you be willing to come back?"   
  
Faith nodded reluctantly.  
  
Giles replaced his glasses, looking at her seriously. "There is another hellmouth, in Cleveland."  
  
Faith squealed, reminding him of Buffy rather than the usually tough Faith. "Thank you, Giles!" To his surprise, she threw her arms around him in a brief hug, before quickly backing off, still smiling.  
  
"Ahem... yes, well, you're quite welcome. However, it's not quite as simple as all that, I'm afraid. I believe the Council will want you to have a Watcher."  
  
Faith winced. "Don't suppose you'd be willing to move?"  
  
Giles was sympathetic, and a bit pleased at her implied compliment. "Er, no, I'm afraid not. However, I will do all I can to see that someone appropriate for you is assigned... I have a young friend, very promising young man, who might suit you as a Watcher quite well. I'll see what I can do."  
  
"Thanks, Giles, really." Faith stood, stretching. "I guess till we get stuff settled I should chill here in Sunny-D, yeah?"  
  
"That would be best, yes."  
  
" 'K. Night, Giles."  
  
"Good night, Faith. Oh, and it would be best to not discuss Angel in front of Spike. They have a lot of... issues... between them."  
  
Faith agreed, happy with the fact that she'd get to leave, and went back to her motel for the night.  
  
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Faith stayed around for several weeks before Giles could get everything arranged. In that time, she mostly stuck to herself, though gradually, she hung out more with Summers and co. She and Spike got to be fairly good friends - enough so, that one night Dawn asked Spike if he loved Faith, instead of Buffy. He'd laughed, and told her not to be 'a silly bint.'  
  
Faith finally remembered where she'd seen him before - when she had stolen Buffy's body. She was tempted to tease him about that incident, but decided against it. Spike tended to be rather aggressive when it came to anything regarding Buffy.  
  
Eventually, though, she left, and life settled into a routine. Buffy and Spike slept during the day, while Dawn was at school. Then the three of them would usually spend the afternoon together before Spike went off to his job as a bartender (with the Buffybot no longer working, they needed a source of steady income). Buffy would spend time making dinner and doing household chores while Dawn did her homework. Dawn went to bed, and within a few hours Spike would come home to pick Buffy up for training with Giles, then patrol.  
  
She still hadn't regained any of her memories, but her muscle memory was surprisingly good, considering she'd spent several months decaying in a coffin, and she quickly relearned those fighting skills she'd lost. Buffy was talking more these days, becoming closer with those around her. From their reactions, she could tell she wasn't quite the same as she had been before, but they all seemed to love her, anyhow.  
  
From some things she'd heard, it seemed she hadn't been very close with Spike, before; but then other times, when they'd tell her stories of what had happened, it seemed the 'old her' had trusted him completely. She really couldn't figure her old self out. Even her old diaries didn't help much. And, really, if she couldn't understand herself, who could?  
  
Buffy decided to talk about her identity issues on patrol with Spike. So after they'd dusted their first batch of vampires - measly fledglings- she started out by saying, "Spike, how much like the old me am I?"  
  
Surprised by the topic, it took Spike a bit to think about this. "Uh, well pet, I guess... I dunno, exactly. You're still you, only different."  
  
She rolled her eyes, a trait Dawn insisted she'd picked up from her little sis, but which Spike assured her she'd had long before her death. "Gee, thanks Spike, that helped a whole lot."  
  
When he didn't reply, because he didn't know what to say, she thought he was insulted by her sarcasm.  
  
"Sorry, it's just-"  
  
Spike cut her off. "That's somethin' that's different. Not a bad different, but different."  
  
Confused, Buffy asked, "What is?"  
  
"The apologizin'. Never heard that from the old Buffy. But, luv, you know the Coven's lookin' into ways to get your memories back. Pretty soon these sorta thoughts won't have any meanin'," he told her, trying to reassure her.  
  
They walked in companionable silence for a few minutes before Buffy spoke up again. In a small voice, she asked hesitantly, "But what if I don't want my memories back?"  
  
Spike turned to her, shocked. "W-what?"  
  
Chin tilted up defiantly now, she repeated more strongly, "What if I don't want my memories back? Who says I have to get them back if I don't want them?"  
  
Briefly speechless, Spike just stood there and stared at her. Who, indeed, said she _had_ to get her memories back? She seemed so much happier now than she ever had been, before. And so many of those memories would be painful for her, too.   
  
But then Spike remembered that some of those memories would be good things, like growing up with Joyce and Dawn - ok, admittedly the Dawn part was fake, but that didn't really make a difference.  
  
And, finally, he came to realize that he didn't want Buffy to get her memories back for a very selfish reason - she liked and trusted him more now than she ever had before.   
  
Knowing his real, selfish motivations would taint anything he might say to her, he suggested that she talk to Giles and Dawn about it, and would say no more when Buffy pressed him upon his opinion of the matter.  
  
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As she'd expected, Giles cleaned his glasses after she'd asked him the same question about her memories.  
  
"Hmmm, well, frankly, that hadn't occurred to me.... I suppose it's a viable option," Giles admitted reluctantly. Truly, he was surprised at the idea. Not get her memories back? Why wouldn't she want to remember who she is?  
  
When Giles asked Buffy just that, she sighed, and tried to explain. "I feel like... like I've been given a second chance at life. Well, ok, obviously... but I mean, not just at being alive, but at living, you know?" From Giles frown, she gathered that he didn't, so she tried again, asking him, "Honestly, tell me - do you think the old Buffy was very happy?"  
  
"Well, due to her -er, _your_ - mother's death, and the situation with Glory, no, but -"  
  
"Yeah, but before that. From what I've read in my diaries, and heard from Dawnie, the old Buffy wasn't happy... for years, probably since she slept with Angel and he went all evil-guy. And then there was that whole thing with Faith... and then she tried so hard with Riley guy, but that flopped... anyway, my point is, I think she was really unhappy, and pretty ready to die."  
  
"Buffy - the old Buffy, as you have been referring to her - had a strong will to survive. Yes, there were problems, but-"  
  
Again she cut him off. "There's one more thing. I don't... well, I don't know where I was when I was gone, but if I was in hell... I read about what happened to Angel after being in hell. I don't want to remember that, Giles, I just don't. I really feel I could be much happier without all of those old memories bogging me down!"  
  
Once again, Giles cleaned his poor glasses while he thought. "Buffy... please, give me some time to think about it, all right?" She nodded grudgingly. "Meanwhile, I think you should talk to Dawn about this... idea of yours."  
  
" 'k. G'night, Giles."  
  
"Good night, Buffy."  
  
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The next day, Buffy talked to Dawn over dinner. To her surprise, Dawn had a completely different reaction then either of the men.  
  
"Wow, Buffy! I never thought of that! Can you actually do that?"  
  
"Uh, sure, why not?"  
  
"I dunno, it's just... huh. I guess I really do want you to remember growing up with me and mom, even though the memories are about me are faked... but I like having you happy even more. You're still my big sister, just... a happier version. And I like that."  
  
"Really? So you'd be ok with this?"  
  
"Totally!" Dawn squealed.  
  
Buffy couldn't figure out why her sister was quite so enthused. Little did she know that Dawn thought Buffy would be much more likely to get together with Spike without her memories. For a long time now, Dawn had wanted the three of them to be a family. They practically were, now, but if Buffy got her memories back, that'd all end.  
  
Oh, and she really did want her sister to be happy.  
  
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A/N: My sincere apologies for taking soooo long with this chappy! I'm just losing enthusiasm for this story for some reason. I might try and wrap this one up fairly quickly, and start another story. I'm afraid if I start something else before I finish this, it'll never get finished, and I hate when authors don't finish stories!  
  
Sorry, too, about the lack of Spuffy. More to come, hopefully!  
  
Thank you all so much, once again, for your lovely reviews.


	12. It’s All About the Blood

Chapter 12: It's All About the Blood  
  
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This chapter is rated PG-13, for Anya's use of the "O-word" and some sexual innuendo.  
  
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Several days after Buffy first alluded to her thoughts about not getting her memories back, she and Spike had a rather bad patrol.   
  
First off, they weren't communicating as well as they usually did. Buffy was still pushing at him to tell her what he thought about the memory thing, and he was grouchy at her for doing so.   
  
Then, they ran into a few vampires; nothing unusual, but Buffy had been a bit sloppy, and would likely have been bitten had it not been for Spike. He berated her for her carelessness as they continued on their patrol. Their argument distracted them, and a group of demons got the jump on them.  
  
Four went for Spike, and two for Buffy, indicating they weren't from around Sunnydale, since they didn't know to attack the Slayer in full force. They were big, burly demons, ones Buffy wasn't familiar with. Hoping her slaying partner would recognize them, she called out, "Spike! How do we kill these things?"  
  
" I - _grunt_ - don't -_smash_ - bloody know!"  
  
"Great," Buffy grumbled, "just great." She was doing fairly well against the two demons. Ducking under a blow from one, she came up behind the other, and landed a good, solid kick on his back, sending him lurching forward, off balance. The first turned to get her, and, dodging another fist, she punched him smack in the face. The other was back, now, and managed to grab Buffy from behind. She leaned over, flipping the demon over her back, and quickly staked him through where his heart should be located; she'd found that often worked with other species, as well as vampires.  
  
"One down, one to - oof!" Buffy gasped in surprise as the other demon she was dealing with gave her a blow that sent her spinning into a nearby gravestone. "Ouch!"  
  
She didn't have time to bemoan the rip in her new shirt, as the demon was upon her again. Buffy fought furiously, anxious to have this fight over and done with. She was starting to worry about Spike, dealing with twice as many monsters as she was.  
  
Buffy managed to kill her last one with by snapping its thick neck, but not without receiving another nasty cut, this one to her leg. Listening for a moment, she heard sounds of Spike's scuffle. In the process of their battle, she and the demons had managed to travel a little ways away from where the others where.  
  
Buffy limped in Spike's direction as fast as she could, pausing briefly to retrieve her icky stake from the first demon's chest.  
  
Spike had taken out one of the demons permanently, and badly wounded another. Buffy paused to finish off the wounded one before continuing on.  
  
The other two were wailing on Spike, who now had numerous injuries. Buffy snuck up behind one, reaching up to snap it's neck. Unfortunately, it sensed her, and spun around, delivering a blow that sent her crashing to the ground, several yards away.  
  
But at least she'd distracted it. The demon was coming after her, leaving Spike only one to deal with. After a few minutes of intense fighting, Buffy managed to stake this one, as well.   
  
Exhausted, she dragged herself towards Spike, just in time to see him finish off the final demon with the last of his strength. Falling away from the bodies, Spike lay where he landed.  
  
"Oh, no," Buffy breathed. Rationally, she was aware that Spike wasn't dead, since he wasn't dust. But logic rarely had anything to do with emotions.  
  
"Spike? Come on, baby, talk to me!" she pleaded as she sank down beside him. Buffy looked at his wounds to see what she could do to help him. Only one, on his stomach, was still bleeding. She tore a piece off her already demolished shirt and applied pressure.   
  
The bleeding stopped within a few minutes, but Spike still would not wake up. He'd obviously lost a lot of blood. Buffy tried to figure out what to do. Staying here and recovering wasn't an option; sunrise was only a few hours off. She could get herself to safety, but there was no way she could handle a comatose Spike, as well. She could go fetch help and blood for him, but there was a serious problem with that scenario: he was a sitting duck out here, all by himself. If anything stumbled across him, they'd probably kill him. Not for the first time, she wished she had a cell phone.  
  
_Ok, Buffy, think_ -_ what can I do? Can't carry him to safety, can't go and bring help - damn! _  
  
Desperately, she glanced around, as if hoping something in the graveyard would inspire her. She caught a glimpse of red out of the corner of her eye - blood from one of her cuts.  
  
She nearly laughed aloud, relieved to have stumbled upon a solution. She'd read somewhere that Slayer blood was more potent than most people's; this would surely heal him.  
  
Buffy propped Spike's head up on her lap. Luckily, she'd torn a nail during the fight, and was able to make a small cut on her wrist. She figured that once she got a little of her powerful blood in him, instinct would kick in, and he should be able to take over from there.  
  
She carefully let a few drops blood fall into his open mouth. As she'd hoped, he morphed into game face. When she brought her wrist right up to his mouth, his fangs sank into her and he sucked greedily.  
  
Buffy gasped at the sensation, a new one to her. It hurt, yes, but there were other feelings besides just that. She felt.... love, lust, and... well, she didn't have words to properly describe the experience.  
  
After a few minutes, Buffy began to grow lightheaded as Spike continued to drain her. With a supreme effort of will, she tried to drag her arm away from him. A hand reached up and grabbed onto her arm, not letting her move. Another moment later, and Spike's eyes began to open. When they did, he immediately released her wrist and rolled away from her.  
  
"Bloody hell!"  
  
"Ok, not exactly the reaction I was expecting," Buffy smiled weakly at him.  
  
Seeing that her wrist was still bleeding, Spike came back over to her, and licked the wound till it closed. Then he sat back with a sigh.  
  
"You all right, luv?" he asked softly.  
  
Buffy nodded. "Yeah... you?"  
  
"Yeah, thanks to you... I can't believe you did that."  
  
"Why not? It was the only thing to do. I couldn't carry you, and I couldn't go get help and leave you here unconscious."  
  
"So you decided to feed me?!"  
  
"Well, yeah! What's the big deal here, Spike?"  
  
"What's the - ! Bloody hell luv.... look, let's head home, sunrise is comin', and then we'll talk, all right?"  
  
Buffy nodded mutely, and the two exhausted warriors helped themselves up and supported each other as they headed back.  
  
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By the time they reached their house, Buffy was feeling the affects of the blood loss. Spike kept threatening to take her to a hospital, but she insisted that she was perfectly fine, nothing some food and sleep wouldn't cure.  
  
Spike sat her down at the kitchen table as he warmed up blood for him, and food for her. It was still before dawn, and Dawn and Giles would be asleep for another few hours.  
  
Buffy ate her reheated pizza as Spike drank his blood with burba weed. Spike didn't actually require much blood, seeing as how he'd had some of hers, and so didn't drink very much. As Buffy finished her meal, he fetched the first aid kit. They talked as they began patching each other up.  
  
"So?" Buffy demanded as she unrolled some bandages. "Wanna explain what that was all about?"  
  
"Listen, Slayer..... Bloody hell, how am I supposed to explain this to you? A person givin' up some of their blood freely, well, it means somethin' - uh, except in the case of vamp whores. And with you bein' the Slayer, your blood is even more important.... and besides that, you let me have _human_ blood! The blood of a Slayer! _Your_ blood!"  
  
"You really can't get over that, can you?" she asked, giggling slightly.  
  
He shook his head. "No, not really... pet, this is something... let's just say, when you get your memories back and are more like the old you, you'll probably wanna stake me for feedin' from you."  
  
Buffy frowned at the lack of logic in that. "But you were unconscious! It was totally my decision."  
  
Spike shook his head again. "Doesn't matter."  
  
Buffy had been mulling over whether or not to get her memories back for the past week or so. This just decided her. "Listen, Spike? I'm not going to get my memories back. And no," she continued as he tried to interrupt, "it's not just 'cause of this. Though this is a part of it. I don't want to be someone who would do that, who would stake you for drinking my freely given blood. I like who I am now. I'm pretty happy with me, and you, Dawn, and Giles all seem to like who I am now. And it doesn't matter what you try to say, I'm NOT getting my memories back, and that's final!"  
  
Spike blinked at her. "Ummm..." he tried to come up with something, something to dissuade her, but, then again - what reason was there, really, to do so? She _was _happy. Not to mention so stubborn that there probably really wasn't anything he could say that would change her mind. So he shrugged, and said, "All right, luv, you win. No memories for you."  
  
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Buffy came to Giles later that day, and told him in no uncertain terms that she didn't want her memories back. Giles disagreed with her, but she was her usual obstinate self, and eventually he gave in.  
  
He'd been worried the Coven might protest that Buffy should get her memories back. To his surprise, the leader of the Coven agreed immediately to drop researching a spell to get Buffy's memory back. Giles didn't fully understand her explanation, but she said something about how it was actually more natural for Buffy not to have her memories - how it was more like a 'rebirth from the earth,' or some such thing.  
  
The head of the Coven informed Giles that Tara and Willow were doing fairly well. There'd been a bit of trouble, at first, with Willow not being willing to do magic 'the slow way,' but the Coven had threatened to send Tara back if Willow didn't behave, and Willow had quickly straightened up. The girls would probably have to stay there for another few months, meaning they'd miss a semester of school. As Giles saw it, that was a small price to pay for what they'd done.  
  
As for Anya and Xander - well, after enough time had gone by (something to do with moon cycles), the Coven did a cleansing spell for all those involved in the spell. Luckily, they didn't need to be physically present for the spell to work. Xander was now off somewhere, doing the road trip he'd attempted once before. He needed to 'find himself,' he said. Anya said that was a load of horse crap, that he was just running away from her. She remained in Sunnydale, running the Magic Box, and counting her money. She kept making vague threats to go back to the vengeance business because of Xander's desertion, but her friends didn't believe she would truly do that.  
  
Giles wondered at what effect Buffy's lack of memories would make on the Summers clan. He figured she and Spike were much more likely to get together, without her memories of Angel getting in the way. To his own surprise, he was rather all right with that. Not overly pleased, but he did want his surrogate daughter to be safe and happy, and Spike seemed to help her with both.  
  
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_Four months later...._  
  
The whole Scooby gang was back together again, and decided a party was definitely called for. They were all gathered at the Summers' house. Many had announcements about their lives which they wanted to share with the others. So after some small talk and some food, Giles stood up to begin. "It is lovely to have us all here, together again. I have a bit of an announcement to make. Now, I don't suppose many of you remember my friend, Olivia -"  
  
"Your orgasm buddy," Anya said brightly.  
  
As everyone laughed, Giles cleaned his glasses. "As appallingly put as ever, Anya, thank you."  
  
"You're welcome. Please continue." Anya said graciously - as always, unaware of her social gaffe.  
  
"Well, due to some health problems, she needs to move to a warmer climate, and so, she will be moving in with me, in my new apartment, within the next month or so."  
  
"But just 'for her health,' right, mate?" Spike teased.  
  
Giles glared at him. "Yes!" He sighed. "Anyone else have anything they wish to share?"  
  
Willow spoke up. "Um, I just thought you all should know - Tara and I are probably going to be spending our summers, and maybe some other breaks, too, over with the Coven. There's so much we can learn there, and, well, it'd be good to be away from the Hellmouth occasionally, and it's not that we want to be away so much, it's just that-"  
  
"It's ok, Will, we get it," Xander assured his longtime friend. "My turn now, I guess." At Anya's sharp elbow to his ribs, he corrected himself. "Sorry, _our_ turn. I did a lot of thinking during my trip, and I think I'm not quite ready to be married just yet. There's some issues 'bout my parents I need to deal with. So, Anya and I are gonna stay engaged, but we're not gonna set a date for the wedding. It might be a while, but luckily, I've found a wonderful woman who's willing to wait for me to be ready."  
  
Anya beamed at him as he squeezed her hand. "I'm pretty happy just being with you, and getting lots of orgasms. Besides, more time means more time to plan! When we finally do get married, I'll have everything already decided, and it will be perfect."  
  
Dawn cleared her throat. "Well, not surprisingly, I don't have much to announce-"  
  
"Except for straight A's at school," a proud Spike interjected.  
  
After a round of applause which made her blush, Dawn said, "Yeah, yeah, ok, I got A's. But last, but not least..." she turned expectantly to Buffy.  
  
Buffy rolled her eyes at her impatient little sister. She rose to her feet, tugging Spike up with her. "As some of you may know.... um, Spike and I, we're together.... And if you don't like it, you'll just hafta deal with it 'cause we love each other!" She turned her head and kissed Spike soundly to prove her point. Turning back to the group, she waited expectantly, next to a smirking Spike.  
  
Giles and Dawn had already known about their relationship. Dawn, of course, was overjoyed, and Giles had accepted it. The real challenge would be the rest of the Scoobies. Spike had faith in Buffy, and in the strength of their relationship. Even if her friends disapproved, she'd still stay with him. But for her sake, he hoped her friends would come around.  
  
Tara, for once, was the first to speak up. She'd noticed the romantic tension between the two long before anyone else, and wasn't as fazed as the others. "I-I think, if he m-makes you happy, then good for you."  
  
Buffy stared at the normally quiet girl, surprised. "Thank you, Tara. He does make me very, very happy." She squeezed his hand lightly.  
  
"Well, I guess..." Willow began. "I guess if he makes you happy, and Giles and Dawnie and Tara are all ok with it... I am too. Might take me a little while to get used to it, though, ok?"  
  
Buffy nodded, understanding where her friend was coming from - it had taken her some time to get used to the idea that Willow was a lesbian.  
  
In her usual manner, Anya told Buffy, "I'm sure you will be very happy. He looks like he could give you many orgasms."  
  
Spike's smirk grew, and Buffy held back a laugh.  
  
"Anya!" Xander exclaimed, finally finding his tongue.  
  
"What? It's true!"  
  
Deciding not to try and correct his girlfriend's social etiquette yet again, Xander turned to the problem at hand. He really had matured since Buffy's death and subsequent resurrection. But, still... "I don't like it," he finally said.  
  
Buffy's face hardened, and she opened her mouth to speak, but Xander continued before she could. "But I realize that I don't have the right to make choices for you. I think it's a mistake, and one that definitely could come back to bite you, and the rest of us, literally, if his chip fails... but it's your mistake to make. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'll deal with it, but don't expect me to be happy about it."  
  
Everyone was staring at Xander, shocked. That was the longest, most serious speech anyone had ever heard him make.  
  
Noticing everyone's attention was focused on him, he shifted uncomfortably. "What? I can be serious!"  
  
"Yes, dear, you can be," Anya assured him. "You just usually aren't."  
  
The group laughed. They continued on with the party, which included the usual: food, drink, movies, and chit-chat. One by one, the Scoobies left. Xander and Anya were dropping Dawn off at a friend's house for the night.  
  
Finally, everyone else had left, leaving only Spike and Buffy.  
  
"Guess that went as well as could be expected," Buffy said as she wrapped her arms around her boyfriend. "You were kinda quiet for a while."  
  
Spike nuzzled her neck affectionately as he replied, "Yeah, well... the only things I could think to say woulda just pissed 'em off. I get kinda touchy when it comes to you and me, y'know."  
  
Buffy giggled. "Yeah, I'd noticed. It's ok, it's kinda... cute."  
  
"Cute! Cute!! The Big Bad is _cute_?!" Spike exclaimed in mock outrage.  
  
"The Big Bad, huh?" Buffy grinned. "Why don't you give me a quick demo of just how Big and Bad you are."  
  
"Why, Slayer!" Spike joked. "Forsaking your sacred duty of patrolling? I'm a baaaddd influence on you."  
  
"Oh, we'll patrol... just _after_ the demo," Buffy purred, as she dragged Spike up the stairs, both laughing.  
  
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As Buffy finally lay down to sleep that night - after love-making, patrolling, and more love-making - she pondered the recent changes in her life. She'd never regretted her decision to not get her memories back, though having to re-meet the other Scoobies had been seriously weird.   
  
But she was happy now, probably much happier than she ever could have been with her memories. She and Spike had their minor spats, but those usually just led to great make-up sex, rather than any real problems. Life, Buffy concluded, was good.   
  
She smiled, and snuggled up to her sleeping vampire.  
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Mmmm... my fangy teddy bear.... _  
  
THE END  
  
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A/N: Woo! Ok, finally got this fic done... I know it may not have as much detail as many would like, what with me skipping four months, but I was really having trouble continuing writing this fic at all.  
  
Thanks yet again to all who reviewed! Special thanks to Lucky-112, who pointed out a mistake I made forgetting about Spike's chip in the last chapter, and to northernlights, who suggested Spike get hurt, causing Buffy to become protective.  
  
I'll probably be writing more in this next month before school starts. I've got some longer fics in mind, but I don't want to end up with any permanent WIP's, so I may just do a ficlet or two, we'll see.  
  
**As for distribution of this story **- just lemme know where it's going, and credit it to me, of course. Sites that already archive my fic don't need to ask again.  
  
Hope everyone you all enjoyed my story!


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